Pisa

"You can only lean against that which resists.”
--Indian Proverb



Without a doubt, the climax of my European adventures occurred during the last week and a half as I traveled through Italy with Houston friends Sam and Leslie. We caught a flight out of London Stansted at the butt crack of dawn headed for Pisa. As we were standing in the "queue" waiting to get on the flight, Leslie whispered to me that we were in the company of greatness. I quickly glanced over my shoulder, did a double take, and realized that she was right--one of our fellow Ryan Air passengers was a bona fide celebrity. It's always difficult to know how to conduct yourself in this kind of situation. You figure these guys get so sick and tired of signing autographs and not being able to go anywhere without being mobbed by people that you don't want to add to the problem just for the cheap thrill of saying you met a celebrity. Obviously the thing to do is come up with some sort of clever line to acknowledge your appreciation of the person without totally getting in their business. For some reason, I've always found that difficult. I think it has to do with the nature of the celebrities I've come into contact over the years. I mean, what are you supposed to say to people like...

John Elway (pre Super Bowl victories). "Hey John, this could be the year. All you guys have to do is put away Jacksonville!"
Tom Landry (post Jimmy Johnson Super Bowl victories). "Dude, just think what YOU could have done with Troy Aikman and Neon Deion!"
Mike Dukakis. "What's happenin' governor? Hey, is it true the Greek translation of your last name is MONDALE??"
John Kerry. "Oh my gosh! It's John Kerry!! My stomach is doing flip flops!!!"

So you can understand the context when I contemplated my options for confronting Andy Serkis...
1. Hey Andy, do you know if there's a meal on this flight? Spoilin' nice fish. Give it to us raw and w-r-r-riggling; you keep nasty chips!
2. Gotta love these early morning flights. Master should be resting, Master needs to keep up his strength.
3. Did that guy stop you and ask for your passport? He wants the precious. Always he is looking for it. And the precious is wanting to go back to him... But we mustn't let him have it.
4. I don't know about you but I'm ready to leave England with this cold weather rolling in. I want to leave now and never come back! What? Leave now and never come back! {brief silence} We told him to go away... and away he goes! Gone, gone, gone!

Ultimately, we decided not to approach him. This was primarily based on the fact that we couldn't come up with his last name and were divided on the issue of whether he would prefer to be addressed as Gollum or Smeagol. I of course immediately wished that Daniel was along on the trip. I'd have loved to see Andy approach him and be like: "Orlando, what in the heck are you doing flying Ryan Air?"